As the holidays approached we prepared for spending time with family members and the joy of having our children and grandchildren around us. But I was also reminded of the stress that it can bring. Whether it is the thoughts of those who are no longer with us or worrying about those who are not in a position to enjoy the holidays. I also thought about how we deal with the “high maintenance” persons in our lives.
As attorneys, we all have certain clients who fit that classification. It may be a client in a civil situation who believes that we have taken them to raise, who cannot make the simplest decision without asking our opinion. Even more troubling, these people often ignore what we tell them or for whatever reason, they forget it as soon as we tell them. Or it may be a person charged with a crime, particularly those who are incarcerated. They frequently have an altered view of reality. Inmates often tend to be more concerned with getting their bond reduced than about the ultimate outcome of their case. I have told such clients that the potential 20 year sentence they are facing is what needs to be our focus. And the chances of a bond reduction are highly unlikely when facing a serious charge.
Another client recently told me that I was a much better attorney than the prosecutor and that the facts did not matter. Thanks for the compliment but that is not a very rational basis for rejecting a reasonable plea offer. Having such control over a person’s future is not a responsibility to be taken lightly. Bearing such a heavy load is particularly stressful when it hits you at the beginning of winter. The days are short and the extending darkness is not good for anyone’s psyche. But stay rational we must. It is not a time for shortcuts or taking the easy way out.
I have spoken with family members with depression and they agree that winter and the holidays is the worst time of year for them. It was a time when Luke’s depression became more prevalent. While we are trying to stay festive, many are hurting. It is the time we need to be more mindful for supportive if we have someone close who is staring into darkness.
I thought I would get through the holidays with no surprises, but not so much. I lost 3 friends in December and 1 in early January. 2 were the same age as me, one a few years younger and one a few years older. Joe Yates was an attorney who I had known for about 20 years. He was a kindred spirit and although I had no association with him out of the courthouses, we shared some common bonds, particularly our political ideologies.
The death that hit hardest though was that of an old friend from high school and college. He took his life on the day after Christmas. He was a very personable and outgoing guy who always seemed to have a positive attitude. It seemed such an unlikely end until I recalled that both of his parents had ended their own lives when he was very young. It hammered home the notion that Christmas is not a joyous time for all.
The Fayette County Coroner reported that in the past year 5 children age 14 or younger took their own lives. It is sad and scary to find that people so young are so burdened with pressures of life that they feel that the alternative to living under such pressure is their best option.
We need to be constantly be mindful of those around us and we must be there for them, providing them with support and reminding them that they are loved and needed.
The Trials of Luke 